My alarm clock went off at 7:45 AM this morning, which noramlly would have been enough to make me want to tear off a limb and hurl it at teh beeping monstrosity, but since i prepared and went to bed at 11:00 PM the night before it wasn’t such an issue.  I showered slowly, getting three minutes behind my timed schedule but parised myself for planning my outfit out the night before.  Jeans to face the obnoxiously cold weather (it’s fucking July and I am wearing pants!) and my favorite green plaid shirt would do.  drink apple juice, grab CD’s, grab lunch to make at work,  get in car, go. I parked my car in the closest spot to the Alumni centers front doors.  The sign says visitor parking, but I figure I count as a visitor because I am there sparringly.  I impressed myself by working quickly, getting things organized all OCD style and doing my copies immdiately to look good for my boss.  She smiled and said she loved how fast I got things done.  I know, I am good.

     Back at my work station things began to get fun.  DeSutter and I had our mornign IM session where we discussed everyoen and everything within a matter of minutes.  It’s to the point, covering facts, swaping predictions and just plain telling it like it is.  Our boring lives seem so interesting that way.  I scanned a lot of stuff after this, reunion books, postcards from mad alumni, old photos etc.  It bored me, so I decided to make my lunch, but alas, I forgot to pack my can opener and therefore couldn’t make the Chef Boyardee Ravioli.  I guess it happens though.  I was pissed for a bried bit, but then Jack IMed me and while I thought my mood would change drastically, it just shifted to neutral.  I battled in conversation about weed usage, it’s effect, my opinions, friendships, dating, life, etc.  It’s always personal with this kid it seems.  And I don’t mean to use “kid” as a derogatory name, but I do feel older then he is.  Probably cause I am by two years. Anyway, this debate wasn’t heated with rage or anger, just curiosity and wanting to know what the other thought about. It was awesome, but I definately stopped working while chattign with him. 

      I left in a hurry to get home, for I wanted to finish talkign to Jack on IM at home.  It seems weird I know, but I just felt like I had more to get to.  Anyway, we wound up talkign about his life and his boyfriend and my thoughts about that situation.  Now I won’t lie, a month ago, maybe even a few weeks ago I would have been annoyed about hearing of the infamous boyfriend, but my crush on Jack has faded I guess.  Now he’s just Jack to me.  Anyway, it was a good chat in the long run, which eventually led to us goign to play Tennis together.  I sported a pony shirt and headed to pick up Jack, but my enthusiasm to participate in athletics wasn’t enough to let me win.  I lost badly.  8 games to 1.  Pathetic.  I need some practice obviously. 

      The playing took my energy, but before eating it was time to shop, ally style.  Yes, Jackola and I cruised the ally of Muncie’s looking for disregarded furniture that could use a new home.  It would be welcome at my 1212 Carson abode do to my lack of furniture since my roommates are moving out and my new ones don’t have much furniture.  I became the proud owner of an oddly shaped gren and yellow arm chair, a beige corduroy recliner, a filthy orange couch that is creaming to be febreezed (so badly infact I left it sitting in my backyard for the night) and a hutch that was in mint condition.  This was all for free, so I can’t complain.  I did scratch my car bumper on the fucking ally entrance ways a million times though.  Muncie roads are rough dude.

      So Jack’s house was where I ended up next where we cooked a pizza, and burnt it.  Double-Cheese the package said, and it live dup to it’s namesake.  The bottom of the pizza was fine, the top layer of cheese was cajun style, complete with black bubbling grossness, but after I peeled these places back there was a freshly melted layer of cheese underneath.  Awesome.  I scarfed it down, then proceeded with helping Jack reorganize his room a little.  Thsi lasted a short while until Aubrie IMed us and we all decided to hack.  I rushed with Jack to the LP (Linden Place Apartments) and we hacked it up in the lit up parkign area.  We peaked early though and not a lot came of the session.  From here it was bullshitting on the couch Aubrie got from a dumpster last year and basically covering the days events.  I thought alot at this time and realized things in life are just insane.  jack wanted to smoke, I could tell, so I took him to Eric’s cause I wanted to shower anyhow, then I went home did so. 

    You’ll notice there was no smoking in my day.  That’s cause I am quitting.  I have said it before, but this time I am serious.  my reasons for doing so are various.  I just feel like I am not being me anymore.  I have changed too much into a stoner and it bothers me.  I don’t want that for me.  I can’t write as well with smoking, I just loose my creativity, but that’s just me personally.  I also don’t like that my social crowd is all smokers.  This doesn’t mean I don’t like my social crowd, it just means I want to branch back out and reconnect with some people.  I have had a blast this summer and I thank Raechel, Eric and Jack for chilling with me and putting up with my sarcasm.  I can’t wait to have more times with them.  I just hope they don’t loose touch with me cause the summers ending soon and I appreciate all of them as my friends.  They are all unique in their own way.

   So I guess that’s all for now, I just stressed myself out with inner monolgue today really.  I don’t want to loose any friends, and if some people think I have a bad attitude about life then they probably just haven’t taken the time to talk to me and figure me out.  I want to cut back on weed and be able to pass a drug test for my soon to be job search after I graduate.  I want to change some things in my life I guess.  I spent this weekend with Beth and Aubrie and that really brought a lot on for me.  It made me feel whole again.  It made me feel like I was who I was before I smoked.  And I liked that.  I want that back.  I want my new friends too.  I can have both.  I am rambling now though.  I guess I am saying it my Anti-drug realyl kicked in this weekend.  thanks.

    Remember to love your shetlands, keep it down cause voices carry, keep your hands off 309 and mmmmm, drink Apple Juice. 



One thought on “

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s