My father showed up at my office door this morning with a handful of mail for me.  It was mail from his house, which for some reason just isn’t finding my new address which I’ve had for over 8 months.  Oh well.  After rummaging through the stack and realizing that it was 90% garbage I proceeded to examine the few envelopes which remained.  One was label “Indiana State Department of Revenue.  This wasn’t going to be good. 

 

            I read the contents and laughed out loud, knowing full and well that I had made a moronic mistake.  I’ve been working since I was 15 years old, grocery stores, front desk, offices, etc.  Like a good American citizen I’ve filed my federal taxes and received an adequate return, but that just wasn’t enough to please the government.  The aforementioned letter revealed that I was ineligible to renew my liquor license due to irrefutable tax liabilities. 

 

            You see, while yes I have taken care of my federal taxes, last year was the first time I have ever claimed state taxes.  I know, I know, I’m a moron.  I was just too lazy to do it I guess, and I never made much money and no one ever said anything about it, so I just didn’t bother.  So now here I am at Indiana.gov printing out old tax form from previous years and trying to figure out why the state cares.  I am not going to owe money at all.  They will just owe me, at least for three of those years.  My first year of failed tax submission will be held against me though and my return from 2001 will be invalid because I’ve taken so lo not finally file it. 

 

            I laugh at all this, A) because only I would be dumb enough to get myself in this situation and B) because the government wants me to file this stuff so that they can pay me money.  It’s senseless on their part really.  And if I had owed them money, they would have caught my error years ago.  Oh well.  I guess the moral of my story is you should never get a real job.  Then you’ll have to file taxes and it’s really a boring thing to do.

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