It’s NOT comcastic!

   Utilities.  They are never a fun thing to deal with.  Today I tried to get my new apartment set up for Internet and Cable.  I attempted to do it all online, this makes it so much more easier then having to talk to some stupid sales representative who just wants to give me more stuff then what I really need, but of course the online feature wasn’t working properly and continually sent me back to the homepage.  I broke down and called.  I had to listen to repeated movie advertisments.  “Your normal over the top, over baring, over protective mother played by Diane Keaton loves her daughter Mandy Moore in the hit film “Because I told you so”.  A) If someone is over the top they aren’t normal. B) I threw up at the mention of a Mandy Moore movie and C) I DON”T CARE!  Finally I got a sales person who tried to sell me a bunch of shit I didn’t want.  45 music channels?  No thanks.  High Definition?  I don’t have a high def TV!  An extra phone line?  I am only getting this stupid digital voice because it makes my whole package cheaper!  They just don’t listen.  The customer service is always incredibly horrible.  It’s a nightmare talking to these people.  It’s like walking into that store “The Buckle” at the mall.  Those people practically strip you down and redress you in an outfit so that you’ll buy something. 

     Not only was the sales girl pushy and annoying, but she made everything extra difficult.  I had to spell my name at least 3 times to her.  She never took my e-mail address even though I specifically said I wanted to deal with Comcast that way.  She told me they have great flexible installation times which turned out to be 9am – 11am, 10am- 1pm, or 1pm – 5pm.  Now I work 6 days a week and keep my Sunday’s to myself.  None of those times work for me.  What, does Comcast not care about people who have normal 9 – 5 jobs?  Needless to say, after bitching to her about the ridiculous set up Jennifer (that was her name) revealed to me that they do have a 7am – 9am window.  Why didn’t she say that in the first place?  What a moron.  I scheduled that appointment, but I’ll probably still be late to work.  Just as I’m about to finalize my order she comes at me again.

   “Adam, did you know that your installation will cost 59.99 but if your bill is over 129.99 a month, just 4 dollars more then your current bill then installation will only be 29.99?  You should buy Showtime movie channels, it’s just 10.00 dollars more.”  What a scam.  They purposely set that 129.99 limit to kill anyone who gets the Comcst Triple Play.  It’s horrible.  These people don’t give a shit about the customers.  It’s insulting.  I agree to her non-sense so she’ll leave me alone.  Then she hits me again, “oh, Adam, it seems you have a previous balance with Comcast that dates back to March of 2005.  It’s for $175.00 at Carson St. in Muncie.  Hmmmm, that’s funny.  I moved out of Muncie in December ’04.  After I graduated.  And had transferred my account over to my roommate Stacey.  Lucky for me, Stacey left my name on the account and either my roommates neglected to pay the final bill or Comcast is raping me.  Either way I was pissed.  I took care of the problem and told Jennifer I hated Comcast with a passion and that they were always taking advantage of people.  She didn’t respond.

    “well, is there anything else I can help you with Adam?”  Yeah, how about a loan so I can afford to live.  I went off on another tangent to her about how I think the installation is crap.  Just mail me the boxes and softwear I can install it.  Oh no, the installation guy has to turn the jacks on.  So I am paying $60.00 so he can flip a fucking switch.   What a waste.  I told Jennifer I was unsatisfied with Comcast but that I was trapped with them.  She said goodye and something about being Comcastic.  I wanted to kill her.  It was my only solution to our ongoing conversation.  Comcastic?  I should sue.  Shetlandponytastic may not be that cool, but I had that name long ago.  I hung up.  Twenty-Seven minutes.  It took Twenty Seven minutes!  What a waste.  If the online feature had worked I would have had it done in 3 minutes.  I hate Comcast.  I hate utilities.  And I HATE TALKING TO SALES PEOPLE ON THE PHONE!  Whew, much better.